Once again, it’s that time of year when people are tempted to make New Year Resolutions. Some people are full of hope and energy. Some are gritting their teeth and trying again. Still others have failed so many times they don’t even bother.
So why are resolutions so hard to keep?
Because most of our resolutions are only surface deep. Lasting change requires change on a deeper level. The Integrity Elements of Trustworthiness reveal the power of linking our commitments (Dependability) to who we are (Authenticity).
James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, describes this linkage in his concept of Identity-based habits. Instead of beginning with outcomes or plans, Clear recommends first choosing who you want to be, then proving it to yourself with small wins.
Here are three tips for transforming your grandiose resolutions into an effective habit.
- Begin with Identity. First, choose who you want to be, as opposed to what you want to do. Your identity will always trump your willpower in the long run.
- Commit to one Small Change. Begin with a slight behavior change that is easily achievable and aligns with who you want to be. Once you have that down, go a little further.
- Set the Conditions. Experiment with how to set yourself up for success. What systems can you put in place to make it easy for you to close your promise loop to yourself?
Resolutions are, in effect, promises to yourself. The ability to keep promises to yourself is foundational to being able to trust yourself—and gives you the confidence to ask others to trust you.
For Reflection: What one thing will you change this year to align with who you want to be?
Update: 23% First Draft Complete
Still at 23%. I’m taking advantage of the holidays to research literary agents, hone my proposal, and plan my queries.
