Wise Trust unlocks the full potential of a team. It breaks down the invisible walls between team members and ignites the synergy of mutually supporting relationships.
Arguably one of the most important mutually supporting relationships in a team is between team members and their leader. Ideally, you should be able to trust your leader to set the conditions for you to succeed while she trusts you to take full advantage of those conditions.
Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. What if your boss doesn’t trust you? Before we get into the warning signs, I have two caveats to prevent you from jumping to conclusions:
- Recognizing one or two of these signs in your relationship with your boss does not necessarily mean your boss doesn’t trust you. Giving your boss the benefit of the doubt, I’ve listed a reasonable explanation for each sign under “counterpoint.”
- Even if you’re checking off most of these signs, it may have nothing to do with you. Your boss may not trust anyone. Every person has a dispositional propensity to trust; some are high, some are low. The biggest red flag should be if you see most of these signs and sense that how your boss treats you is different than how he treats others.
So, with those caveats, your boss may not trust you if he or she…
- Withholds information from you. If you’re “taken by surprise” a lot in your job—i.e. personnel changes, resourcing adjustments, and priority shifts seem to come out of nowhere—your boss may not trust you with strategic or sensitive information. Counterpoint: Your boss may be equally in the dark!
- Doesn’t give you feedback. If you have no idea what your boss thinks about your performance, that’s not good. It may indicate your boss doesn’t trust you to take it well…or trust you can improve your performance. Counterpoint: Giving feedback can be difficult, your boss may just be bad at it.
- Micromanages you. Nothing screams, “I don’t trust you” like micromanagement. If your boss hovers over your work, checks in more often than the scheduled progress reports, or adds other people to your team to “help,” he may not trust you. Counterpoint: Your boss may be more of a doer than a leader, and struggles with delegating.
- Avoids you. The only thing worse than your boss being all up in your work, is when your boss is never around. If she doesn’t initiate contact, cancels one-on-ones you schedule, and ignores emails, she may not consider you trustworthy. Counterpoint: Your boss may be overwhelmed and unable to manage her own calendar.
- Overlooks you. If key assignments and promotions seem to be passing you by without your boss considering you for the job or position, it may indicate he doesn’t trust you to handle more than what you’re already doing. Counterpoint: Your boss may not know of your interest in greater responsibility.
- Shuts down your suggestions. If your ideas, advice, and concerns are consistently and summarily dismissed shortly after you share them, it may mean your boss doesn’t trust your judgment or your loyalty. Counterpoint: Your boss may not be as open to innovation as you are.
A team where the leader doesn’t trust someone who reports to them is in for a lot of unnecessary pain and frustration. If you see any of these signs in your relationship with your boss, check out this article where I discuss what you can do about it.
For Reflection: What evidence do you have that your boss trusts or distrusts you?
